First Holy Communion

Today I went to my neighbour's first Holy Communion and it made me to remind me about my first Holy Communion.

I made my first Holy Communion in May 14th, 1989. I was 7 years and I was soooo excited. From that moment on I could receive the host every time I would like and it would make me be closer to Christ. I went every Saturday evening with my mom to mass and I tried to reveive Communion every time.

Furthermore, my mom presented me a veeeery beautiful "pink Princess dress". When I was really young, 4-5 years, I remember my dream was to be a princess as Sisí. I cannot remember how many times I watched the Sisí films... even today, when they are showed on TV, I watch them!

I remembered my sis was soooo young and so cute. At that moment I was not concious of that, but today I was and I would like to have lived that moment again.

All of these memories come to my mind today and I felt nostalgia.

Once someone has made the first Holy Communion, it is assumed you will to go mass every weekend at least. I did during much time, but along the years, I have entered in a crisis and I stopped going to mass. Why? I do not understand many things the Church considers sin. So I cannot confess myself about sth that is a sin but I dont think it.

Sometimes I go to church, but not assist to mass.

I had a time where I went to church almost every day (I was still in the school) and I felt sooo good, I had peace inside. I have not been able to get that peaceful state anymore at that grade.

It's true that when I'm worried about sth, I go to a small church close home. After this, I feel better, but it is not the same.

I know I will come back sometime... when? I'm not sure, but I will... I have to find my balance again although it is taking me a lot of hard work.